Withdrawing from Pornography

This is the 3rd day without my vice of internet pornography!!!  It has been a challenge to say the least.  I feel like there is so much more time in the day.  Who says there are only 24 hours in a day?  I feel like I have 30 right now.  That shows how much of my energy I was wasting in this addiction.  I feel quite good about the opportunities that I am now opening myself to.  There has been so much in my life that I have let slip through because I did not feel good enough about myself.  Now I am starting to feel this confidence and optimism come back.

Granted it is only 3 days in, but I am more focused and on point than ever before.  I broke up with a girl last weekend, which for me was a tough thing to do.  The emotional support and love that I received from her were amazing, but I was using her love because I did not have any for myself.  I thank her for loving me and also for letting me mature.  It is interesting how certain things happen and at the time they seem pretty rough, but in hindsight it was always meant to be.  Emotionally it is very hard for me to say goodbye to someone that I have opened up to.  I feel like I am being abandoned, which dates back to very early in my childhood.  Rationally I know that is not the case in this situation, although emotionally it feels like it.

On top of this I am giving up a vice that I have carried for many years and did not put down even while I was in the relationship.  It has been my safety net and my biggest hindrance.  For this I know that it is time to let it go and all that comes with it.

Onward I go…..